This waiting is horrible. I have this most horrendous wrenching weight in my stomach... in my heart. They started the pruning at John's work. Apparently the guys come in with a box in hand, tap you on the shoulder, and tell you to pack your stuff. That's it. Every time John calls from work I'm scared it's going to be a "I'm coming home" call.
I imagine what it must feel like to be one of those workers.. when they come up to you.. how their stomach must sink to the floor.. how horror struck they must feel.. how all sorts of thoughts of paying bills and feeding their families must run through their heads...and of course they must think "why me?" I pray and pray that John will not have to go through that.
I know that if he does things WILL work out.. it always does. What is the worst that can happen? We lose our house? Yeah, that would stink but we could always start over. We happen to live in an area where houses are selling.. so if needed, we'll just sell to break even and move on. Things would be okay. It would be hard for me to convince John of that.. but they would be.
Of course, our life would change tremendously and I don't WANT our life to change. I would probably have to get a job which would, in turn, break my heart. I would HATE not being with my girls... BUT we are blessed to know that if needed, there are family members who would watch them.. I wouldn't have to put them in daycare.
Life could be worse than just experiencing a job loss. We could lose a child. We could be terminal. I tell myself and John this all the time.
But... still..... oh how I pray they walk past his desk!
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2 comments:
fingers crossed for you and john - but no matter what, you are right, it will all work out!
I hope they keep walking past his desk too...such hard times we are living in.
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