In Hospital

Admittedly it wasn't as bad as I first envisioned. When told I needed to go over there and that she would need to stay for a night or two I immediately saw movie scenes with teeny tiny babies hooked up to all manner of machines. My imaginings were much worse than reality though I would not care to repeat it...

In Actuality....

The bad points

My teeny tiny girl was in bed with her arm in a splint to hold the iv in... Sunken eyes, red-rimmed... The look of betrayal as they hurt her was hard to take...Those little arms reaching for me to save her from these horrible people...every three to four hours they wake her to make her cry...so frustrated when she JUST went to sleep and they came in loud and rude and refused to come back later...I know its just a job people but what if it were your baby...Worry that maybe its something besides the virus keeping her bicarbonate count down...no sleep....not being able to take her walking around because she was contagious...the nurses wearing gloves, masks, and aprons like my baby had a disease...worry and frustration when she refused to eat or drink anything... the head shaking from the nurses because she isn't better yet... my heart wringing because I cannot fix it myself.. seeing other kids there, not wanting to see them... looking away and knowing that mine is lucky and will be going home soon ... Sunday's wait to be released (Dr. Ramos didn't show up until nearly 3pm!)

The good points

Happiness when Little Bit is obviously starting to feel better... realizing that in spite of the situation John and I both were getting a rare opportunity to just be with her....never experienced that before...discovering Ainsley's personality all over again without Aidan there to take away attention...watching her just BLOOM with so much undivided attention...wow!... heard so many new words out of her... her hamming it up to make us laugh... learning to my joy the no matter how much of a drama queen she likes to be, she really is a very easygoing girl... gratefulness it was the easy-going daughter there and not the other...

Sick Baby!

Snuggling
Feeling Better!